There is no way,
No. Damn. Way,
that I'm ever gittin' stabbed to death in the shower by some dude wearin his mamas dress.
Although I'll admit that A shotgun in the shower usually takes A little 'splainin' when I have guests over.
Fuck em if they don't understand.
Before my last GF moved out, she was upstairs, taking a shower one night while I was drinkin in the kitchen, making us some vittles.
Maybe it was that last shot of Jim Beam, I dunno, but for some reason I thought It'd be fun to go up and scare her.
So, trying not to laugh too much, and thus spoil the fun, I crept up the stairs and into the bathroom.
It was all steamy in there, and I could see her through the shower curtain, washing herself, all humming and singing to herself and shit...
Real quick-like, I fired up my chainsaw and threw the shower curtain back, revving the motor and screaming like a maniac, laughing my ass off.
What made it perfect was the fact that I'd taken her completely by suprise, and the look on her face, partially obscured by the smoky exhaust from the chainsaw, was classic.
[i reckon I'd mixed too much oil in the gas, I dunno]
Wish I'd had A cameraman, swear to God.
Anyhow, instead of grabbing up the shotgun, she just screamed, and kinda fell down in the bathtub, covering her face and hollering.
At that moment, it became crystal clear to me that she wasn't really the one for me, and that it wasn't going to work out.
Any woman worth a damn would have grabbed for that shotgun. I don't need DR. Phil to tell me that.